As you may know. This world was separate into two categories. Either black or white, dark or light, good or bad and yes or no. Whoever dares to question the logic will be define as a traitor. You may not beware but those things have lived among us for a very long time. They were there long before we were born, and they will be there for so long after we’re gone. Such a strong believes. For the last 22 years I also followed that pattern. Judge human behavior according to the rules I didn’t made. By doing so… I thought I was doing the right thing. Everybody thought I was doing the right thing. At the 23rd year, I just had realized, I was wrong.

                           Who gets to define what is right and what is wrong. Who gets to write down all the rules that humans have to follow for over a thousand years. I mean seriously? Aren’t you tired of everything? What’s the rule were made for? Don’t you dare tell me that the rules were made to keep the world at peace. Take a look around, take a look at yourself. Does the rule really made your life easier? I don’t think so. The more we follow the pattern, the more suffer we are. The world is going to be a better place if only we can write a story ourselves. No more rule, no more punishment. More importantly, no judgment.  

                           From the bottom of my heart, the only rule I want to follow is the rule of honesty. So many lied I’ve made. So many mistakes I’ve done. Looking back in the past and think “I was being honest to myself more than I do right now.” The advantage of being a child is that you are allowed to do a lot of mistake and everyone is going to forgive you just because you are young. It’s true. No one can blame for your ignorant. A child is allowed to do a mistake because it is their first time, they had never learnt. Which is totally difference from us. A part of being an adult means you are not allowed to do any mistake. In every step you take, every choice you make - it has to be cautious as if you are walking on the breaking ice. One simple mistake and you’re finish. The world is going to turn their back on you. And there is nothing you can do to modify.

                           You think you have faith in people? You think the one you love will always forgive you? You think the others have such a strong believe in you? You may want to take a little step back and reconsider again. The closer you are is the easier you may break. Human’s heart is such an unsolved mystery. When it loves, it loves real hard. When it deny, even if it take a thousand miles to escape, it will run away like you cannot get it back.

                           Ever wonder why some kind of people do the same mistake over and over again? That’s because they’ve never learnt. Whoever says that people learn from their past – wrong. People don’t learn from their past, they learn from their pain. The agony in our heart is not truly the heartbreak. It’s only a mechanism. Self-defense mechanism that prevents us from losing what we hold most dear. The crying, the sorrow, are the tools to keep what we love safe and sound.

                           A few years ago, I did a mistake; just a simple one and it changed my life forever. The butterfly effect has never been more realistic. Ever since, I can only live my life carrying on the regret. I learnt from my pain, not from my past. And nowadays before I take any step I have to consider twice at least. I cannot take a risk just to lose what I’ve succeed so far. Life is not hard, it is the people who make it harder than it seems.

                           Now let’s go back to the rule of honesty I mention earlier. White lie is so common this day. Why? Because it’s what keep people from being in pain. Or worse…. Keep us from the true we run away from. Yes, you got it right. The true I run away from. Ever since I’ve accepted one of the most dangerous feelings, I have to live my life within a white lie. I can only accept it in my heart. But I can never say it out loud. There is no point to confront the true. There can be only dealing with the great white lie. Or else, I’ll fuck up, no doubt.

               Can’t help but wonder. What is going to happen if I was in a different world? The world where there is no rule written by the stranger who has nothing to do with my life. What is going to happen if I fight to get what I want, who I want. Am I going to feel more relieve? Am I going to regret it later? But I guess I’ll never know. Because I don’t live in the world where there is no right or wrong. I live in this world, the same world as yours.  The world where we have to maintain a lie if we want to survive. The world where “create a lie” is better than “being honest”. What I pretend to be is more acceptable than what I truly am. Great! What a lovely world to smile for.

               Admit it, this world is not a place where you can be honest. It is for the better if you remain silence forever and always.

               During this time of war, fools build the wall, wise man build the bridge. Morality is the only wall between me and the truth. My bedtime story is a lie. The truth is forbidden. Prohibited to say it from both ways. One way street is me at this moment. Invisible U-turn may exist but I can never know. I’m the greatest liar you ever met. Welcome to my white lie world. Please have a seat and enjoy the show.